(Left: Nude Lesbians Making Coffee Following Orgasms c. 1955 Please note handy phallic hairdo.)
Well, I've managed to once again do what I do best which is put off until tomorrow what I could have done today. Looks like I'll be thinking about setting an alarm to get up and get my ass down to the shore at some reasonable hour tomorrow and maybe actually get out in my kayak or go to the beach! At least I could get the kayaks on the car and pack a bag tonight, if I ever get off the internets.
It sucks to have these bumpy periods when I get to feeling stuck. I'll have to start making note of any kind of rhythm to them...how much you want to bet it's related to these damned hormones! Sure, blame it all on the gonads!
Not The Gonads!
Anyway, I said, "Fuck it," this afternoon and decided to shit yet another evening away on the internets. I'm beginning to think I might have a problem here. But. But, there are so many interesting things out there! So, I decided I'd post about feminism (peripherally) and pene (penii? penises?) and other sex organs (Gonads) and voluptuous, sexy women (inclusive of all their luscious body parts) tonight and then I could feel as if I'd done something productive with my Friday night, after all.
After I created the fake Technorati "cult of the penis" tag for a previous post, I went off on a penis/cult tangent that was most
(Above: One of my favorites)
amusing. I was sorely disappointed at the dearth of "Cult of the Penis" sites out there. Although the two search phrases I chose elicited almost two million hits each, I'm sure that's primarily due to the presence of the word "penis" in each. One would think between all the seething, man-hating radical faminists and all the dude-loving gay guys out there there's be a lot more open reverance of the phallus on the internets.
I marveled that it happens (or is allowed) that castration shows up fairly early in a Google search for either "cult of the penis" or "penis cult." You'd think the guys would be a little more careful about that kind of protection, wouldn't you? With Bushie breathing down people's necks over everything from abortion to having friends in foreign places and with who knows which government agency archiving our phone records and internet search logs, you'd think some small-wienied GOPer would have wiped those castration sites offline by now. Somebody's head will roll, I'm sure!
I much preferred the image search I did a couple of months ago for "voluptuous women." Being the bitch I am, I require access to voluptuous women, or facsimiles thereof, on a regular basis. Since the internets is the only current outlet for that, I've ammassed an impressive mini 'collection.' I've sprinkled some of my favorites that you haven't seen before through the post for your viewing enjoyment.
One site I spent some time on in my "cult of the penis" search was Majikthise. I've somehow managed to find Lindsay on several occasions so I figured it was time to add her to my list of feminists in the sidebar. I don't dare add her to my Google Web Clips thingie or I might never get out of the house. I loved this post about the "Orgasm Cult." Oh yeah. Where do I sign up? Reading the comments, there was one thought that returned repeatedly to my mind..."Are there really people out
(That was traumatic...back to the women.)
there who don't know what a Pearl-type vibrator with clitoral stimulator looks like???" How can this have happened? We are not doing our jobs well enough.
What particularly drew me to the post was the mention of Senator Robert Menendez, of my lovely home state of New Jersey. Okay, second to the use of the phrase "orgasm cult." I love New Jersey and I miss its cesspool-like politics. At least we Jerseyans never elected an asshole of the grand proportions of my current statemates in Pennsylvania!
Reportedly, a researcher working on a film denouncing Bob Menendez once orchestrated a smear campaign against the wife of a New Hampshire gubernatorial candidate claiming that she was a member of a cult that "advocates adults and children have orgasms as a means to reaching inner peace." (If, by children, we're talking about teenagers or kids engaged in their own little activities then, again, where do I sign up?) Read the whole NJ story here.
Yes, I did the research and managed to come up with the original Portsmouth (NH) Herald article here. Turns out Mrs Humphrey did belong to the American School of Orgonomy. I can't find "The American School of Orgonomy" on the internets but I've managed to find a college for it, located in, where else?...New Jersey. Have you ever craved a degree in orgasms? This is the place. (By the way, this is where you can sign up for the cult.)
Seems this science is the brainchild of one Wilhelm Reich, a Freudian psychiatrist and member of his inner circle. (Above: Lesbian foreplay.)
Hmmm. Seems the orgasm creates a measurable emission of energy, orgone energy to be precise, which is "the trans-dimensional, subtle, energy matrix of the universe," according to Dr. Reich. Hey, he even experimented with Einstein!...on an orgone accumulator. (Kinky!)
I shouldn't mock it. God knows I know how essential a good orgasm is to ones emotional well-being. I am unapologetically pro-orgasm! And maybe there's something to it, although this theory will never be my primary motivation for achieving climax. I guess it just struck my funny orgone, umm, bone.
Anyway, Christopher Lyon, the woeful opposition researcher, apparently swings from both sides of the plate. Governor Jeanne Shaheen was the beneficiary of the malefactor's malevolence in 2000. She was the Democratic governor of the state of New Hampshire from 1997 to 2003. She was defeated at the polls in her 2002 bid for US Senate by John Sununu amid yet more political scandal:
In June 2004, former Republican consultant Allen Raymond pleaded guilty to jamming Democratic Party lines set up to get New Hampshire Democrats to the polls in 2002, an action that some (most notably, Smith) believe may have contributed to Shaheen's narrow loss.Can one say Karma? I wonder what Chris Lyon was doing in 2002?...
of a US state. That's sexy! On second thought, maybe not.)
Oh, I promised you gonads, didn't I? I have what feels like mittelschmerz-type pains in the area of my left ovary. That would put my period 2 weeks away...or tomorrow, who knows. God-damned gonads!
God, I was in a weird mood tonight!
tags: clitoris / cult of the penis / internets / orgasm / penis / sex / sexuality / US politics
(Left: Let's end with this, shall we?)
*****Click the God-damned pics, if you didn't! Sheesh!*****